Men & emotions

Jay Lincoln

Jay Lincoln is a holistic life coach.

Men and their emotions  


Portrait of a young man crying

Ten simple questions to ask a woman! All yes and no answers only.


Do you believe men show their emotions?
Would you like your man to show more of his emotions?
If your man did show you more of his emotions would you know him better?
Do you show all of your emotions to your man?
Do you think men show different emotions to women?
The last time your man showed his emotion, did you judge the emotion?
Was the judgment a good response for you personally?
Do you show all of your emotions to your man all the time?
Would you say a good or bad relationship / friendship has anything to do with a man showing his emotions?
Do you think society / upbringing has anything to do with why men do not show all their emotions?

I look forward to hearing some of the feedback you receive from doing this survey.


Some feedback from me when I did this survey for myself. I found that women perceived that men did not show very much emotion, and if they allowed themselves to do this life may be a little different for them. Another interesting observation was that women did not always show all of their emotions to a man, yet would often judge the emotion a man was expressing, based on what that meant to them. There was also overwhelming support that society / upbringing had a lot to answer for. So let’s look at some of the reasons why men may not show all of their emotions.

Remember some of these sayings as you grew up!

Big boys don’t cry
Men that show emotion are weak
All men should be strong 
Men are providers woman are caregivers

There are many more and no doubt you could relate to some that you have been exposed to as well. So how has all this affected the way men show their emotions? What about the other side where men are starting to show their emotions more than what they are used to. Are they still being viewed by women through a framework of the sayings above?

What about how women like to perceive their man. There is a perception out there that the man is to take care of the woman! There is also the opposite perception as well, yet I feel it is not as predominant as the first. This is not only in relationships but also friendships, families, workplaces etc. We could go on with lots more questions and open up a whole different discussion which I feel would defeat the purpose of this article.

I would like men to explore some of the beliefs or perceptions of the way they think they should be. A simple little exercise is to analyse and write down 4 or 5 different beliefs you live by. When you have done this, then I would invite you to look at how you may be able to change the wording around in a way that would lead you to look and perceive things differently.

Once you have done this look at what actions behaviors and attitudes you would like to change to support the new way. Even sit and talk with women about what they think on some of the things you have identified about yourself and some of the new things you may be looking at doing. Who knows what may come of that!

Guess what?
What if we reversed everything and did this on women?
Wonder what the outcomes would be?

Let’s explore more of this next week, so until then have an awesome week.

You can contact Jay by phone on +64 (9) 815-7855, or you can email him.     

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