Funny Jokes

Rolling top 10 Funny Jokes from around the world, updated daily and archived here for your ongoing enjoyment. We've got hundreds of funny jokes below to get you laughing.

Short jokes, sport jokes, relationship jokes through to political jokes our audience have contributed some absolute stunners and they're all below, just click on through!

New jokes are added daily so make sure you bookmark this page.

  • Saving up for 75 years

    24 May 2013 / Funnies

    A small tourist hotel was all abuzz about an afternoon wedding where the groom was 95 and the bride was 23. The groom looked pretty feeble and the feeling was that the wedding night might kill him, because his bride was a healthy, vivacious young... More about Saving up for 75 years

  • Partial disability

    23 May 2013 / Funnies

    A man was being interviewed for a job. "Were you in the service?" the interviewer asks. "Yes, I was a Marine," responds the applicant. "Did you see any active duty?" "I was in Vietnam for two years and I have a partial disability." "May I ask what... More about Partial disability

  • Cork Screw

    22 May 2013 / Funnies

    Gary and Martin were standing at the urinals in a public lavatory, when Gary glanced over and noticed that Martin's penis was twisted like a corkscrew. "Wow," Gary said. "I've never seen one like that before." "Like what?" Martin... More about Cork Screw

  • The Watch

    21 May 2013 / Funnies

    Little Johnny sees that his friend at school has a new watch so he asks him how he got it. "I waited until I heard the bedsprings squeaking in my folk's bedroom and then I ran in. My father gave me a watch to get rid of me.", replied the... More about The Watch

  • Pain reliever

    20 May 2013 / Funnies

    A man went to the dental surgeon to have a tooth pulled. The dentist pulled out a freezing needle to numb the area. "No way! No needles! I hate needles," the patient shouted. The dentist started to hook up the laughing gas and the man again... More about Pain reliever

  • Lines

    17 May 2013 / Funnies

    One day, there was a catastrophic event that caused all humans on Earth to die. To sort things out, everyone went to Heaven. God came in and said, "I want the men to make two lines. One line for the men who ruled their women on Earth and the... More about Lines

  • First Date

    16 May 2013 / Funnies

    A young man called his mother and announced excitedly that he had just met the woman of his dreams. Now what should he do? His mother had an idea: "Why don't you send her flowers, and on the card invite her to your apartment for a... More about First Date

  • Be strong

    15 May 2013 / Funnies

    A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.  He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top... More about Be strong

  • Apples

    14 May 2013 / Funnies

    The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching." Moving further... More about Apples

  • Winning toast

    13 May 2013 / Funnies

    Patrick  hoisted his beer and said: "Here's to spending the rest of my life between the legs of me wife!" And with that he took home the top prize for the best toast of the night. In bed later that night, he told his wife: "Mary, I won the... More about Winning toast

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