Howdy loyal readers, Avalon here.
Starting with this article, I’ll be going through every step to the pick-up process sequentially – from the approach, all the way to the bedroom (at which point you’ll need to consult other resources). In return, I expect only ONE thing from you:
Go out there and DO it.
Go out two or three nights a week. Read my articles. Apply them. Face your fears. Endure humiliation. Grow stronger. Become glorious.
Or don’t.
Close this window right now. Forget everything I’ve said, and accept that you’ve chosen comfort over growth.
Those are the terms. Have we got a deal?
Then let’s get into it.
Today’s take-home message, and the MOST important ingredient of a successful approach is:
Convey indifference to outcome.
Conveying indifference to outcome means that the woman in front of you knows that you do not CARE whether the interaction goes well or badly. Counter-intuitive, huh?
This works on two levels. When YOU don’t care about the outcome, you stress less and do better. When SHE knows you don’t care about the outcome, it signals something else entirely...
Indifference to outcome is the hallmark of ABUNDANCE – and abundance is the single most attractive quality to women.
Abundance means that you have an abundance of women. Women in your life are not in short supply. Imagine how you would approach a woman if you had 42 lingerie models sitting at home, waiting for you to bang the shit out of them at the end of the night? Number 43 would be great, but you don’t really care. It doesn’t mean that you don’t WANT the girl you’re talking to. It just means that it doesn’t particularly bother you whether you get her or not. After all, there’s 42 at home, and thousands of others out and about.
Remember, indifference to outcome is NOT the same as indifference. I woke up yesterday and really wanted spaghetti bolognaise. When I went to my favourite Italian restaurant, they told me they didn’t have any. I was disappointed. After all, I had my heart set on pasta. But did I really CARE that much when they didn’t have it? Nope. For god’s sake, it’s just pasta. I can have some for dinner, or the day after, or I could go walk to another restaurant. Sure, I wanted it, but I was indifferent to the outcome of whether I had it right then and there.
Get it?
OK, now let’s get our hands dirty with applying it when you’re out and about.
There’s one small problem though. You can’t FAKE indifference to outcome for very long. See, the thing is I’m not just asking you to learn how to convey indifference to outcome. I’m asking you to learn how to convey GENUINE indifference to outcome.
In other words, you’re going to have to learn how to actually NOT CARE.
Now there’s a lot of ways you can do this, which generally involve fancy mindfuckery. But the easiest way, in my opinion, is to fake it until you make it. As you begin to emulate indifference to outcome, you will begin to internalise it. At which point, it’s no longer emulation but a GENUINE EXPRESSION of your internal state of mind.
What does indifference to outcome look like?
You face the woman directly. Your shoulders are squared. Your feet are planted. Proximity wise, you are close enough to put your hand on her waist or lean into her ear without looking uncomfortable.
Eye contact is focussed and intense. You almost never break eye contact when you talk with her. Your eyes are relaxed, but slightly mocking – as if you have an inside joke with yourself about her.
Your face is expressive and relaxed. A face that is stone cold without emotion is usually a sign of nervousness, not staunchness. You smile when you find something funny. You don’t just smile for the sake of it.
What does indifference to outcome sound like?
Your voice conveys AUTHORITY and AMUSEMENT in equal parts. This is the MOST important aspect of the approach. Too much authority and you sound like an uptight asshole. Too much amusement and you lack the critical element in seducing a woman – balls.
Authority is what you voice sounds like when you tell your dog to stop shitting on the carpet.
Authority and amusement is what your voice sounds like when you tell your dog to stop shitting on your comatose friend’s face.
Otherwise, your voice is LOUD, with a slow-medium pace, and the downward-slanting tonality of authority.
Excellent examples include: Ari Gold from Entourage when interacting with Eric or Dana Gordon; Hank Moody from Californication; Barack Obama when roasting Donald Trump.
Interestingly, for an example of what you don’t want to sound like, check out Hank’s agent Charlie from Californication.
Listen to the examples. Note what they have in common. Learn to hear the music behind indifference to outcome.
What next?
Once you’ve got your body language dialled, and you know the VOICE of indifference then apply it to the following lines.
Hey, you’re cute. I want to meet you. [Statement of intent]
Hi, I’m Johnny RealName. *pause* [Neutral]
Hey, who are you? [Baiting]
Go out two or three nights a week. Use each approaching line at least FIVE times every night. Keep practising until you’re able to have a one-minute conversation. Then read next week’s article on GENERATING ATTRACTION.
Until then, take it easy.
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One thing - your line "Hey, you're cute. I want to meet you." is a bit weird to say to a person in person.
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