Here's a little story to prove my point about having women validate themselves to you and not the other way around.

I've had my eye on a cute little blonde for a while. She’s a promo girl, or what we call a “hired gun” in the pick up business. Whilst she is very good looking and hot all around, she is the quiet one in the group of her equally hot friends. She doesn’t say much and it’d be hard to isolate her from the group when out. So how to draw her out and get her to engage? Here’s how I did it.

At a recent party the group was sitting on a sofa doing their thing. Up I walk and before engaging the group I looked at the target, (sitting on the far right) and subtly tickled under her chin whilst saying to her “You’re so shy, it’s adorable” in a patronising, cutesy voice. I then immediately loudly greeted the group and chatted for a minute or two (mostly taking the piss out of the super-hot alpha female leader).

The result was telling. By patronising the target and pointing out a character flaw I made her hungry to validate herself to me. Sure enough, two days later she pops up on Facebook chat with “I’m not shy!” this has led to a pretty constant dialogue where I doubt her and she validates, over and over.

Now the point is, I'm not being mean to her. What I'm doing is reversing the situation. Normally a guy will try to sell the girl on him. He will jump through her hoops, be over-nice and try to come off as the perfect guy. This is just the worst way, as you by now know. What I am doing is subtly getting her to jump through my hoops, prove to me that she's hot enough, smart enough and fun enough to be with me. Somewhere deep down she realises that I’m screening her to see if I’m prepared to invest in a relationship with her. It also makes me stand WAY out from the crowd since I’m not desperate to get her.>

This is your introduction to Negs: Very subtle negative comments directed at the target indicating a negative social judgment. The hotter the target, the more and harsher the negs required. The purpose of the neg is to disqualify yourself from being a potential suitor. Now you’re smart enough to see why this works in spite of what I just said. By negging the target, you confuse her and force her to validate herself to you. In the case study above I used a very subtle and well aimed “Sniper Neg”. I pointed out a personality flaw very quickly, with touching and only the target heard it. It worked. I'll write a full column on negging in the near future. 

By the way, if you're in Auckland, we're going to start going out to a few places. Join the Colt Lifestyle page on Facebook if you want to learn more.

Homework:

Observe your targets and note down some character flaws they have. Just little ones that are cute. Like the silly pout they do when they put on lip gloss or how they sound like a guy when they call everyone “mate”. Drop it into a conversation sometime with a piss-taking tone and see what happens. Drop the subject after two minutes and talk about something else (NOT sport).

Action Points: 

You don’t always have to be nice. Be a bit mean to targets you approach.

Make the target validate herself to you. Show a lack of interest.

Join the Facebook group now.